About: Shell to Illusions 10-11

Snow Paranoia Vacation ~Shell to Illusions~ 10

Snow Paranoia Vacation ~Shell to Illusions~ 11

What seems to be a single story has a lot going on behind, Middle School Girl Aurora is the present core taking over the shell, in a very what-if situation.

In Business Partner, its more about her father and playing around with stuff, including a “happy” ending.

In Driving Partner, you have the shell becoming “addicted” in a relation where he is dominant. He is not that wrong, it is the end of the line, there is no present day Aurora and he takes care of that,  problem is what is called “timebomb”, the core has enough and ends the shell by destroying the body.

In the main story there was a warning and action…

but the shell actually did well in the end, the reason? because of the core actually waking up, thats Dark Cloud Aurora.

It had been so long, and everything is different, the old injuries are there, so the core divides in two, past and present, the past goes back to sleep and the present tries to wake up, thats the whole Little Wolf process.

The present core assimilates the shell and “wakes up”, but she has a timebomb of her own, the, what you can call, “Delusion of the Actress”, the endless search for her cousin.

And based on that, this story is going on, which I really like, the full swing of craziness, but also the very fast correction when things go to the deep end, then she has to take care of her own life, as help never really came.

“Dont you know, you have to do everything yourself”.

It sounds bitter but its not, dont wait, get things done, its not even about death, one day youll be old and wont be able to do half of the things you could do in the past.

then you talk about it, happiness.


About: Shell to Illusions 05-09

Snow Paranoia Vacation ~Shell to Illusions~ ch 05

Snow Paranoia Vacation ~Shell to Illusions~ ch 06

Snow Paranoia Vacation ~Shell to Illusions~ ch 07

Snow Paranoia Vacation ~Shell to Illusions~ ch 08

Snow Paranoia Vacation ~Shell to Illusions~ ch 09

In the fifth chapter you have them making a deal, in how they were going to be together, solve their problems together and live their lives, also together, a pretty daring idea of her that became a reality later.

And with that the storyteller created a shell that could get along her fathers lifestyle, the obvious question is, why wasnt he there? but with him there, no reason for the shell to exist.

nobody died? a happy ending? “your shrink must be proud”

Well, thank you, not for long though.

Muchuuuuu, desu.

Then we move to the next story, in the brewing of the new what-if shell, we have an Actrish image teasing him around, until the boiling point reaches…

To wake up as this Reo version that is in a relationship with his highschool girlfriend.

Big breast, I mean, big eyes, I mean, with the elements that could bring them together.

Shes pretty normalish, but also cute and fun, with some money and he pretending to be normal, things can get along.

Well, almost.

For the core he is like a puppy, but for other people, normal people, its too much aggressive. In this story, he could calm down and they eventually got together.

Someone has to drive.

And wear pretty dresses.

And finally the harsh reality, the core does not love her, yet the shell explains, there is nothing else, this is the end of the line, and she loves us, at least the image of us.

But she is not having it, and just as promised at the Intro of Happiness of Marionette, the Core ends the Shell.

Next comes the Middle School Girl Aurora story.




About: Shell to Illusions 01-04

Snow Paranoia Vacation 02 ~Shell to Illusions~ 01

Snow Paranoia Vacation 02 ~Shell to Illusions~ 02

Snow Paranoia Vacation 02 ~Shell to Illusions~ 03

Snow Paranoia Vacation 02 ~Shell to Illusions~ 04

“Oh, you said it was going to be normal…”

You should know by now, that even if I try, I cant. Another difficulty presents when ideas burst by the push of a hormonal rush, which are rare in me, so to reproduce it across the days and to continue developing the story, yeah, not gonna happen, theres not much to do when the chemical fuel isnt there.

In the first chapter you have the premise of the story and why of its existence, current Au has a bunch of daddy issues, Au style, as she realizes that she could solve most of her problems by just being like her father, yet rejects again and again, it implies that she likes being more like her mother, which would actually solve those problems way faster, what goes into the shadows is that she has to be, herself, not a copy of them.

You have emotions coming and going form Aurora about her father, its so bittersweet, he would say, oh, so great if you were like this…

sorry, sorry, like this:

and she would say, it would be, so amazing, if you were like this…

Kind of the same happened with her mother, but theres a big difference, they were a couple in a long informal secret relationship, this is father and daughter, the link is there, youre not going anywhere, or as mother Aurora would laughingly say “thats your problem, not mine”.

“What costume shall the poor girl wear?” Shell to Illusions.

In chapter two starts the lovely relationship between two business students, he is a Reoish full personality, with father dominant genes. She, is a combination of many, I guess, cuteness around. While he is already half way to succeed in his career and such, she, in her mind, is struggling to make it happen in the future, she doesnt have the connections and experience. (Uh, not on purpose, she is making one, him).

Oh, but I let him a “curse”, to be, interesting, I need something to relate, otherwise I wouldnt care, Im not a business person, I feed pigeons thinking about ducks instead.

And thats Apathy, of course was what the whatever doctor told them he had, you know how much they battle, or better said dont apply themselves as much as (they) cannot exploit, to come up with even terms for something that goes on and has since ever.

I dont need to tell you about the sour side of business, but theres also the sweet side, to make stuff actually happen.

And not to make things longer, at the fourth chapter she decided to stay, though its just the beginning.

I dont know if this story will be long, I was thinking of the ending, then the abusive Reo story, and to finish with School Girl Au, then Core to Illusions, instead of our lovely character here, you have the Core dealing with a young Reo, in the main story, a would be the Core awakes at a younger Reo age.

Nightmare of  Cold Night is an “I dont love you anymore” story, and Snowdrop is a broken twisted Reo. Aaand theres many others too, so much work to do, gladly, it would be so boring otherwise, and senseless, and dull, lifeless, apathy.

What are you gonna say in three thousand years? did you have any fun? was it worth living? are you beliefs completely obsolete? do you have any strength or skills to be on your own? cause theyre all gonna be dead, all your servants and slaves, yourself, all the people that used you, and you back as well, aaaaall dead, can you look to the past with a smile? whats left of everything you did? you see, these stories, for me are like genes, thats why theyre so worth to make.

-Im not even talking about taking advantage, you have to, you must think as a storyteller person.
-Sounds, tricky.
-In your mind, it organizes things very quickly, how do you want to live your life and take decisions.

A feminist comes from the Actress, a business person comes from her Father, a storyteller comes from Aurora, yaaaaa, what to be???!

Ahgg, what I dont like about these story notes, is that my brain sticks with certain words, if I try to write it all at once, damn, its annoying.


About: Snow Paranoia Vacation I

Theres gonna be a bunch of new stories for Snow Paranoia Vacation called Shell to Illusions and Core to Illusions, each I and II, maybe III but most likely moving on to other new ones or adapting the trail for the already made.

In the first chapter of those, well have the main characters as witches playing around a cauldron, in the first Shell a Jeff Jr will be made, in a romantic rich young adults sophisticated story. (The girl will be actually blonde, so far, and yes, theres gonna be sex).

Core I will be the same but with a, emh, girl, Jeff Jr. (She is a girl, but not Aurorish)

In Shell II well spice things up and will be and abusive story with the same setting,

I dont think it will go far, so the witches change it again into the first part of the Middle School Girl Aurora story, then that goes on as Core II.

With the lovely Actressish-Cousinish Teacher, and an obsession that turns into a real relation.

In short words, theres gonna be some “craziness” vacation, hehehe.

Though not for long, theres Snowdrop, which is told backwards, with a broken evil Reo and a practically dead Core; The original Puzzle story, with an abused runaway girl later becoming the center of a cult; And finally Nostalgia Flowers, with the last days of the Reo personality. Among other short stories.

So, theres a loooot of work to do, starting from zero for the new, I guess its gonna take a while.

About: Little Princess 01-04

Snow Paranoia Vacation ~Intro~

Snow Paranoia Vacation ~Little Princess~ ch 01

Snow Paranoia Vacation ~Little Princess~ ch 02

Snow Paranoia Vacation ~Little Princess~ ch 03

Snow Paranoia Vacation ~Little Princess~ ch 04

And with these, we start and finish the first of the Snow Paranoia Vacation stories.


In Little Princess, just like in the Aurora story, you get two sides of the narrative, the a little weird but normal small kid Little Aurora, severely abused by her parents, innocent and powerless to the forces that surround her.

and then you get…

And things start to make sense.

Instead of the Aurora ending with the dead of her mother, here it goes to a more, comedy side, in a way more accurate picture of who they are.

You know, with all the tragedy around the whole story, I sure take it with a lot of humor, I dont think I can even find another path.

“You are too stubborn, but you cant take care of yourself, if youre gonna be like that you must to be able to make your own stuff happen.”

“-She can afford being like that, she doesnt really need anybody.”

I guess Jeff never really understood, nah, he did, but it was an excuse not to push things too far.

“Why?” thats the real question.

… that one didnt even exist…

…neither this AuAu…

snow, like a doll made of snow, it doesnt move on its own, its out there, along with the freezing wind … until it gets warmer and melts into liquid water, losing its shape… like a forgotten memory… of what never happened… hihihihi… hehehehe.

This is from the Innocent Grey game ~Caucasus~, also the snow girl with the flower.

Yaaaaa, Aurora and her dad have such a bittersweet relationship, and chapter 04 gets very sentimental.

Next comes, I dont know, havent decide, uhh.

About: Lost Mighty Wolf 07-09

Happiness of Marionette 04 ~The Lost Mighty Wolf~ ch 07

Happiness of Marionette 04 ~The Lost Mighty Wolf~ ch 08

Happiness of Marionette 04 ~The Lost Mighty Wolf~ ch 09

How difficult can it possibly be? just write a letter, then avoid all obstacles between her and the real message, and funny thing, that might include her, but most likely, you. In this case, Aurora might be such a big bully, but she really likes what she loves.

Something so simple can become a path for the madness to develop, or maybe an excuse for being so much of a coward, not that I know much about love letters, Ive never done one before, probably this whole thing is, thats why it is so fun to write.

We also get a little review on the real side about “Taken by the Demons”, and the very obscure objectives of Demon Reo, which can be resumed in an endless travel to the distant past, a transformation of so different worlds, he is living in one where he doesnt even exist, though he really does, they all living in depression, the murder of her cousin is what makes the goofy smile turn into emptiness and lack of worth.

To be honest, I dont think she would have made it that far, in the Demons timeline, it all would have ended with the old personalities, they were searching for her, that was the drive, without it, and without her mother, I dont even think I have the creativity to write about it, or maybe I do, something about some doctor describing mental disorders, and all being made up, though theres nothing to describe but a corpse then, “a boy without a heart”, surrounded by denial for convenience, which leads the way for a demon to arise. Ah, everything goes in circles.

And guess what?! Little Wolf makes a come back in the later stories! ahhhhhhh!

eh, not really, in the newest story “The A Adventures of Dark Reo”, certain personality is brought back to temporarily and successfully deal with a complicated situation, and for him to exist… the core this time doesnt go back to a childish personality of herself, just in form, Little Commander.

Oh, the A goes for Autistic, not Actress, buuuuuuuuuh.

What to do? what your mother does, and she comes for a visit in the last chapter, the end of being lost… the end of a shell, you are what she made.

Next comes “Snow Paranoia Vacation”, with a bunch of what if stories and stuff like that, later Little Wolf takes over the shell and so the present core, Aurora, awakes in “Storytelling Days”.

About: Lost Mighty Wolf 03-06

Happiness of Marionette 04 ~The Lost Mighty Wolf~ ch 03

Happiness of Marionette 04 ~The Lost Mighty Wolf~ ch 04

Happiness of Marionette 04 ~The Lost Mighty Wolf~ ch 05

Happiness of Marionette 04 ~The Lost Mighty Wolf~ ch 06

The story continues and the, emh, peculiar situation Aurora is in becomes very evident to her, the knowledge was always there but now is the time to face it.

Overcoming the trap that became the shell personality, the boy without a heart, then an explanation of whats going on, a solution for the old problems and the configuration of the “new” ones, but hey, the point is to keep playing, not to win.

Youd think she wants to find her trust fund and inheritance, but some people just live in another dimension.

You know, if Reo was a real boy, this would have turn pornographic really quick.

Theres new stories on the works, a new one between a painter and a model, their company, her life and his past, it comes from the whole actress thing, difference is the setting, they are actually together and he is very shy, its gonna be so romantic, and sad, Au style.

Another is the Doctor Adventures, taking a walk on the normal side, shell style, Aurora is too much for them, so with time, a translation from the strange foreign language, along with some good old right arm and eye weakness, but hey, the new Ceran is too nice looking for a facial paralysis.

Pretty, such style, so great.

Lets do a story here next week

Of love, and life, and details, and sound

Ill do it beautiful just because Im thinking of you

A portrait of everything I can see

And you wont even be there.


About: Lost Mighty Wolf 01-02

Happiness of Marionette 04 ~The Lost Mighty Wolf~ ch 01

Happiness of Marionette 04 ~The Lost Mighty Wolf~ ch 02

Oh, feels good to be working back again, I know I just said it, but it does feel great, now that finally the pigeons decided to behave and things have gone much more calm around. ahhhh, so cool.

After Little Wolfs “explanation of their past” in the last story ~Ashes to Illusions~, now comes the what a hell is going on, and the first hit on the head is the more casual and simple explanation, you are horrible and you are crazy.

In the intro of the story you have the Lost Boy, soon to be Teacher personality, being emotional about the awakening of the present core, and how he remains behind because its not the past core personality, so you have Little Wolf and Reo moving on while he is in the shadows.

In chapter one the classic “I should have done” when in retrospective, and then the you suck explanation, which is also the easiest thing to do, self hate.

In chapter two you get some answers, along with their attitude towards life, Little Wolf is laughing all along cause she enjoys being such a bully, Reo is much stronger now, so he overcomes the trial and at the end something very, emh, funny, he proves the core personality by solving the mystery of his strange affections, and how the actress should have been forgotten by the shell actions, yeeeet, someone else fell for it too, who is now angry about it.

In the discussion the sexual drive often gets mentioned, which is kind of a trick here, cause there is no fuel for that, the mixed organs pretty much take care of that, the reason why the twin personality is boy-girl in either past and present, after certain head “accident” happened. Later is told that the genetic, emh, weirdness, comes from a twin absorbed in the uterus, along with a dark little story about Aurora being so possessive of her mother.

In short words, Little Wolf is walking the necessary path, while using “what should be normal” to keep bullying Reo, until it backfires when the actress comes to into play.

About: Ashes to Illusions 09-12

Happiness of Marionette ~Ashes to Illusions~ ch 09

Happiness of Marionette ~Ashes to Illusions~ ch 10

Happiness of Marionette ~Ashes to Illusions~ ch 11

Happiness of Marionette ~Ashes to Illusions~ ch 12

Sure has been a while, feels so good to be back working.

First I had to deal with the new pigeon situation, going good now, then this and that, and theeeen I slipped while sweeping and I hit the back of my head, so I kinda lost mood for some time.

And back to our suicidal story, if you were to say it was escapism I dont think I would agree, in the psychology discussion and the value of life, for our male main character here it was done for in those dreadful circumstances, but he was angry about it, and saw greed as a way to overcome, he realized the true purpose of war and went along the lucky way, and then he met her.

Everything changed when he fell in love, but she was to die and he was to be involved, thats what explains chapter 11, she was already sick “from design” and had a plan for the final days, the difference is that she liked him, so he was part of it.
He didnt follow, for her it was clear that he wasnt ready, and he wasnt sick, so he keeps going on while floating, doing what she would have done at the “new village”, until chapter 10 and 12 when he realizes, well, his own self.

It goes from a very depressive and oppressive standpoint, he couldnt find elements of attachment in this new world, his child was not his, he had a high position among the wealthy people around him, yet he didnt feel anything for them and their values, since childhood he was always a step back, because of the dead of his parents and living with his ugly aunt.

And going to the last chapter, he finally figured it out, he believed all along about the treasure, of being gold, of being her, of a goal to conquer in order for life to make sense, and it did, but deep inside him it was not resolved, until he “learned to fly” just like her, watching from the carefree attitude of loligrandma Aurora, to let go.

I wish I had written more about her, though I actually did, theres a lot been said about her in such little text.
“I think I finally realize what I didnt have
To create, energies from the self”
The world is too big and its own, keeps rolling on, new people will come and all will be forever hungry, its all about the self and whatever emerges from it, if youre angry and depressed, I take the act of being as a vengeance, not to vengeance but to be, the bite back, theres a horrible reality out there that comes from a very bloody past, its all grey and lost already, and you werent even born, if you have the slightest pride you dont fade, you explode and expand, he grew wings and followed his heart, to the great adventure that is her light.


About: Ashes to Illusions 07-08

Happiness of Marionette 03 ~Ashes to Illusions~ ch 07

Happiness of Marionette 03 ~Ashes to Illusions~ ch 08

Once before I had the policy of not doing drawings at the same time as writing, then I had to deal with it and go along both, sure its difficult on the emotional side but you keep on. Now I face a new situation, when I have to write two, or more, stories at the same time, the one going through my head and the one Im currently working at, so… its not like I have much ram left, ahggg.
Anyway, in our current story, once I thought of making it about some very evil dude and forever smiling grandma Aurora, but then, as I kept writing and with my current emotions, it developed into something else, now its gonna be a “Big Sky” lethargy struggle.

He does, kind of looks like Jeff, aaaah, I guess I cant let go.

Though he is different, or at least I try him to be.

And also a little bit of what life is worth living for, Auish style. She is in such “happy mode” that even breaks the story and talks about the narrator, Little Wolf, or maybe is the other way around and she wants to be in, uhhh.

Chuchu goes the train…

Im kind of depressed cause I had to let a bunch of pigeons go hungry today, and its a little cold tonight, thought they poorly behaved, otherwise I would have given in. I sort of lost the territory I gave to them, I took some in, but even with all the controls, theres too many of them :(  which wouldnt be a problem if they learn to behave!!!

I did fed the more friendly though, but I think I missed a young one with cancer and the wife of a half blind one… theres so much you can do, its all part of realizing how small you actually are, and let go.

They really hate the nightly rain when they sleep without a cover, damn I feel sad, now that I could have extra time to write after Josephine died, this is my bigger kick by far, yet it is not about air ideas, sounding cool or convincing people, is about what life is worth living for.

“They dont really like you, they like the food” oh, Ive always known that.

Mother is always right, especially when she tells you cannot have a duck for a pet, even when they live in the streets just like you did.

I have a ring, I have a dress, I have an empty shell

By the books below teacups Ive kept a kind of hell